Overview:
Though the process of becoming a tad more conservative with age is a well-documented phenomenon, the abundance of Democrats comfortable with the term "family values" is on the rise. In the Eighties, formerly-liberal baby boomers were often criticized for subscribing to The Wall Street Journal, power lunching, buying expensive cars, and becoming Yuppies.

Lieberals are easily distinguished from Yuppies because instead of basing their conservative leanings on fiscal concerns, they shape their worldview on what's best for children. Many Lieberals have kids of their own and use this child filter to formulate their decisions on everything from First Amendment issues to taxes to Survivor. All Lieberals suspiciously over utilize the word "sensible" and think there is no greater sin than spanking a child.

Signs You're a Lieberal

• You've traded in your Volkswagen for a Volvo or a Saab.
• When hot under the collar, you've been known to refer to someone as a jerk.
• You own a copy of Tipper Gore's Joined at the Heart: The Transformation of the American Family.
• You limit your children to a maximum of 2 hours of television per week.
• You sometimes wonder why no one at work wants to discuss Prairie Home Companion around the water cooler with you on Mondays.
• You're active in the church or synagogue, but wish they would use gender neutral pronouns when reading from the religious texts.
• You cancelled your subscription to Harper's in favor of Newsweek.
• You endorse equal rights for women but think that Camille Paglia is a little "out there."
• You often wonder why Al Sharpton can't be more like Martin Luther King or Booker T. Washington.
• You support any war overseas, as long as it's referred to as a peacekeeping mission.
• When making a fist, you place your thumb on top of your index finger.

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